Hey, blogettes! How many of you are doing sports this fall? I am doing cross country, and so far so good. I have learned to push my body through the pain and just think about the rewards instead of thinking about why I am putting my body through it. I think about how much better my body is going to be and how much easier the mile is going to be. I picture my team winning a meet, and then winning the big meet at the end of the season where we are against all of the middle schools in our division. We are competing at the 3A level. These first few practices have been a little rough for me because I have never ran in the place where we are running before. I am not used to their hazards, and terrain. Plus, I haven't ran in like the past month due to injuries. I still have a back muscle injury so I really shouldn't be doing this, but I am because it is too late to quit now.
I love cross country because it is the only sport where nothing matters really. As long as you are trying, and you push yourself, and you finish then you are good. I ran 1.7 miles up hill today and back in 20 minutes, even, which isn't bad if you think about the hills, and then traffic. It was painful, and trust me, in that last leg I was crying because I hurt, and I was so tired, I also fell, and hit my knee on something metal and heard a pop. I almost thought about quitting, but then I said that I didn't finish last and I could do anything that I put my mind to and sat out to do. Our first meet is September 10, at a place where there is a huge hill. I'm not looking forward to that, but hopefully it is going down hill on our run. I have never ran hills before, but now I am going to go into school early to practice them. I need to be able to run up them with ease. I have no issues controlling the down hill type of thing. I have that down pat.
Since we get to the school where cross country is held like thirty minutes before cross country is held, we just chill out in their lunch room, which is way better than ours, or at least I think so. We get to do homework or just work on something on our laptops. Sometimes, I prefer to just listen to music, or sit and observe what that school is like because it is way different than ours. This year, we have two mangers for a team of 45 people, and two coaches, who are super pumped and enjoy pushing us, and they believe in us.
I also have a part in Hello Dolley which is our school's Fall musical so I am going to be super busy. I don't know how I landed the part, but I was told to sign up and I did, and I got an email saying that I was automatically in. I was excited, yet I am going to be stressed out because I am not going to be home a lot and there may be some days where I go right from cross country to play practice after a quick shower, and be a little bit gross. Hopefully the locker rooms will be open at school so that I can take a quick shower at school so that doesn't have to be the case.
I hope I don't have meets on the days of my performances, but so far that is not the case, and I hope it won't be, because I am not going to miss the chance for me to shine in front of people that I know. I have a feeling that seventh grade is going to be memorable, fun and easy if I don't fall behind on school work. I am going to be super busy so there might be quite a few late nights, but you know oh well, I guess that is the price that I have to pay if I want to do like everything that pops up.
No, I am not trying to be a show off or one of those people who poses like they have a life when really they are just doing random things because they want to make a life. Believe me, I am not doing cross country to show off, or have a life. I mean you don't want to see/smell me after my run. It's just bad and I look and smell awful, and I feel awful because I need food and water, and preferably something cold that I can pat onto my forehead with my bandana so that after I run, and it is time for our cool down I don't have sweat coming into my mouth because sweat tastes awful, as I learned today during cool down time. I'm still desensitizing my mouth from the taste. It's waste that the body is trying to get rid of and therefore it is not meant to go back into our bodies.
We are learning about the human body in science and that is how I know part of this stuff. I don't know what part I have in Hello Dolley just yet, but I will make a post on this blog when I know. The show is sometime in November I think it is that first weekend and I am so pumped to be able to work with the high schoolers again on stage. My older sister is going to audition and who knows if she gets a part then we will both be in it, and our parents will be super proud sitting in the audience. The high schoolers at our school are so talented when it comes to putting on shows, like they run smoothly, and they are just amazing. I was amazed just being in the audience and in fifth grade I got a silent role, and in sixth grade I helped backstage, and this time I have a for sure speaking part for a girl, or at least I am hoping because my guy voice is awful.
I think I am going to have a ton of memories to share from this year, and a few scars. 2013 has treated me amazingly to those types of things, and I will make sure that the memories and legacies made in this year live on. I really want them to because they are amazing. I wish that this year could last forever because it was my year of luck both good and bad. It was also the year that I learned a lot of things that will be great for later on in life.
The teenage years are a whirlwind, with people trying to find who they really are, and hopefully our blog will help us all survive these odd years of our life.
Friday, August 16, 2013
Wednesday, August 14, 2013
We Survived
Congratulations, blogettes who went back to school today, we survived! It only gets better and harder from here, but at our school, we get all of our required classes in before lunch, and after lunch it is basically a fun afternoon because we got to pick what we did for sixth and seventh periods, after a period of just plain reading, which I am hopefully going to use as a bible study. After lunch we basically have a 30 minute free time to spend anywhere where there is someone watching the area doing what we want to do. I love that because I want some chill time at school. I hate being on the go 24/7 because kids shouldn't be like that, whether or not we are in secondary school now doesn't matter we still need that time. That time is also used for learning labs if kids need extra help on things.
Learning labs can either be required or if you want to pop in. I think I might pop in every now and then because I really want to make sure I have things down because my parents have been out of school for at least thirty years now or at the least twenty five. I love my schedule, and I love that most of the teachers are laid back. I think that this is going to be a good year, and the schedule seems less confusing. I also have my locker all organized and ready to rock when we start real school tomorrow. The new math teacher is into the same things that I am into, so I think I am going to become really close with her, and she is going to be my favorite teacher this year.
So far, my favorite room would have to be the art room, or the band room with the new carpetings, and cubbies redone or so it seems. I love the art room because it has paintings on the ceilings, and has a distinct smell that is actually good. I also love it because the only thing that we need to bring is our sketch book. Everything else is provided for us. I love the teacher, I have had her before, and then we got the elementary teacher who I liked last year. The art teachers before her were kind of bad and treated me differently than they did the rest of the class.
Cross country starts tomorrow and we share it with another school that is two or three miles away. I also like it because it is seventh and eighth grade together and it is boys and girls combined. We will get bused over there, and maybe bused back. We change there, and I am hoping that there is someplace where I can wash off the sweat before I put on my street clothes again because I hate having pit stains or smelling like sweat. I don't mind sweating it's just the after effects that I mind.
Lunch is different, but I like it. Our new dean of students is cool, even though he is a dude. I think I'll like him, after a little bit. I am still unsure of all these new people because I don't know their backgrounds, and I am afraid that I will say something that upsets them, and then I will feel bad about it every time that I see that person. I have hit it off with the math teacher though, which is good. If we have to borrow an object from her, we have to leave a shoe because she hopes that will remind us to return the object. She said that lots of kids just walk off with the object, but she said that if we leave class without a shoe, then we will think that something is missing, and return the object and redeem our shoe.
This afternoon, cross country people just chilled out in a room looking out onto the courtyard with a big picture window. It was just lovely. I got my locker organized and stuff labeled so I know what journal is for what class and what color I have for every class. Here are my colors in order of my classes.
Social Studies-Orange
Language Arts-Red(2 sets, 1 for Reading, 1 for English)
Math-Teal
Science-Black
In the afternoon, they offered three classes as well, but I opted not to take them this class instead of doing things that I was interested in, and knew about already. I mean, this afternoon schedule is only for quarter one. We pick again in quarter two. This way, I have time to think about it some more. Band starts on Friday. This school year is going to be great. Now if only locker drama would resolve. We're working on that though, and I am sure that by the end of this month that it won't be a problem at all. First days are kind of nerve racking and confusing, but this one wasn't as bad.
Learning labs can either be required or if you want to pop in. I think I might pop in every now and then because I really want to make sure I have things down because my parents have been out of school for at least thirty years now or at the least twenty five. I love my schedule, and I love that most of the teachers are laid back. I think that this is going to be a good year, and the schedule seems less confusing. I also have my locker all organized and ready to rock when we start real school tomorrow. The new math teacher is into the same things that I am into, so I think I am going to become really close with her, and she is going to be my favorite teacher this year.
So far, my favorite room would have to be the art room, or the band room with the new carpetings, and cubbies redone or so it seems. I love the art room because it has paintings on the ceilings, and has a distinct smell that is actually good. I also love it because the only thing that we need to bring is our sketch book. Everything else is provided for us. I love the teacher, I have had her before, and then we got the elementary teacher who I liked last year. The art teachers before her were kind of bad and treated me differently than they did the rest of the class.
Cross country starts tomorrow and we share it with another school that is two or three miles away. I also like it because it is seventh and eighth grade together and it is boys and girls combined. We will get bused over there, and maybe bused back. We change there, and I am hoping that there is someplace where I can wash off the sweat before I put on my street clothes again because I hate having pit stains or smelling like sweat. I don't mind sweating it's just the after effects that I mind.
Lunch is different, but I like it. Our new dean of students is cool, even though he is a dude. I think I'll like him, after a little bit. I am still unsure of all these new people because I don't know their backgrounds, and I am afraid that I will say something that upsets them, and then I will feel bad about it every time that I see that person. I have hit it off with the math teacher though, which is good. If we have to borrow an object from her, we have to leave a shoe because she hopes that will remind us to return the object. She said that lots of kids just walk off with the object, but she said that if we leave class without a shoe, then we will think that something is missing, and return the object and redeem our shoe.
This afternoon, cross country people just chilled out in a room looking out onto the courtyard with a big picture window. It was just lovely. I got my locker organized and stuff labeled so I know what journal is for what class and what color I have for every class. Here are my colors in order of my classes.
Social Studies-Orange
Language Arts-Red(2 sets, 1 for Reading, 1 for English)
Math-Teal
Science-Black
In the afternoon, they offered three classes as well, but I opted not to take them this class instead of doing things that I was interested in, and knew about already. I mean, this afternoon schedule is only for quarter one. We pick again in quarter two. This way, I have time to think about it some more. Band starts on Friday. This school year is going to be great. Now if only locker drama would resolve. We're working on that though, and I am sure that by the end of this month that it won't be a problem at all. First days are kind of nerve racking and confusing, but this one wasn't as bad.
Wednesday, July 31, 2013
Back 2 School: Only A Week Left of Freedom
Hey, blogettes! Wow, has this summer gone by fast or what? I don't know about anyone else, but I'm kind of ready to go back to school. I miss seeing the people that this blog is for everyday, and I miss hearing them give input or talk about the blog at school, and it is fun knowing that the boys if they have something like this that mine is probably way more organized, fun, and better because you know that girls can do everything that boys can except for we can do it better. We have willpower to get things done, and in case you haven't noticed, we girls tend to fight for what we believe in.
That and I miss my laptop and the freedom it gave me to write a post whenever I wanted to, and the way that I was connected to the world through it. I had everything I needed for a good life. I also had everything I needed to do well in school and be super smart in almost everything, all thanks to having the internet basically at my fingertips, and a few words typed into a search box.
This blog is going to undergo some changes this year. Like I'm going to do vlogs, music videos of cover songs, as well as sing some songs that I wrote myself, and now will start to sing it because I have found myself and my voice this summer and now I am going to raise it. The me that went through bullying is now gone for good. There is nothing left, and the new me is ready to start shining. I feel like it already has. Now, I am going to focus my life in helping girls who are bullied in the same forms I was, and telling the world about the Lord, and living life to the fullest.
That and I miss my laptop and the freedom it gave me to write a post whenever I wanted to, and the way that I was connected to the world through it. I had everything I needed for a good life. I also had everything I needed to do well in school and be super smart in almost everything, all thanks to having the internet basically at my fingertips, and a few words typed into a search box.
This blog is going to undergo some changes this year. Like I'm going to do vlogs, music videos of cover songs, as well as sing some songs that I wrote myself, and now will start to sing it because I have found myself and my voice this summer and now I am going to raise it. The me that went through bullying is now gone for good. There is nothing left, and the new me is ready to start shining. I feel like it already has. Now, I am going to focus my life in helping girls who are bullied in the same forms I was, and telling the world about the Lord, and living life to the fullest.
Monday, July 22, 2013
Uplifting Summer
Hey, blogettes! If I were to describe my summer in one word, that word would be uplifting. I've had a great summer overall, but there were a few bumps in the road. I had a black eye, and was on crutches for a week, from these boys at the local pool, they thought it would be fun to body slam me to the bottom, but they got kicked out so it wasn't really fun for them, there was some drama, and a terrible loss of life that is still hard on me believe it or not. But the good outweighed the bad stuff big time.
I went to see TobyMac in concert last night, and it was so uplifting and a really fun time. One of my friends who had seats down in front on the dirt track at the fair ground got asked by TobyMac himself to dance on stage during the last song. That was so cool. I'm now proud to say that I am a true Christian and I am not going to hide my faith away any longer because I found myself this summer so it is time now to show the world who I really am. I've been hiding for the past four years. It's time that I make my come back and leave my mark on this world. As a bullying survivor, I'm confident that this is the right time.
He played my favorite two songs, and I cried because Unstoppable brought me back to the time where I was being bullied and I played that just to have that confidence boost to get through the day, and City on Our Knees, well that was the song that I played when I first got in the bullying mess for some reason, and I will continue to play it even though I'm no longer in that mess praise the lord. It was just awful in those four years, that I'm so happy that I overcame and I never want to go back there again. I'm unstoppable now. I am going to do the things that I want to do because I want to leave MY mark on this world, not anyone else's mark.
In twenty one days, that will be happening, and I am kind of nervous. I hope people like and accept the real me, and if not they will have a long four or five years with me because I'm not changing anymore. I'll only change for me, because what I want is what counts. Not what anyone else wants. If I listened to other people like I did before I'd be going a million different directions and things would catch up with me sooner or later. Believe me I wish I could go back four years and change everything back but I can't do that. I wasted four years of my life.
My friends tried to tell me that from the start but I didn't bother to listen to them and now all I can say is sorry because they were right, and they left me. I have new friends now, but they won't ever be as good as the one who saw me through. She's a Christian as well, and thanked me for being so open about my faith on this blog. I just told her that I wasn't all the way open until now. Thanks for pushing me this far Rachel and TobyMac. I love you guys lots, and I look up to you as my role models because you are so amazing. I'll never be as amazing as you, or even close. I'd fall flat on my face and be back to square one before that would happen.
I'd also like to say thanks to all the blogettes who have viewed this blog and made it into what it is today. I would have given up a long time ago if it wasn't for you. The vlogs start in 21 days and I am nervous for that because I have to be spot on because I am recorded. These vlogs will make my blog be more interactive and allow you to have more of a connection to me, and the things that I write about.
This school year might get wild at times, but there is not going to be a dull free moment. I want to make sure that everyone is smiling, and doing good. No one deserves to feel down. I felt down a lot last year and I held those feelings in and put a fake smile on my face. No one could really understand what that year was like, but I made it through and I overcame bullying. I am now going to tell others that they need to spit out their feelings. It isn't healthy holding them in. Bullying is not okay and if you speak out and up against it, you'll get out sooner because the bullies know that they won't win. I didn't do this until the fourth year. I should have done it sooner but the lord had it all planned. It all happened for some reason or another, and I know that I can tell others about it.
If you are being bullied, I want you to know that I am here for you, and that you do matter and you do have a voice that needs to be heard. I know my passion was singing and acting. This blog is also my voice I guess. Oh, and here's a thing I learned about friendship a couple of weekends ago. It is possible to stumble upon friends. I did, and we have been texting each other a lot. This blog actually connected me with a friend as well who just adores this like crazy.
I went to see TobyMac in concert last night, and it was so uplifting and a really fun time. One of my friends who had seats down in front on the dirt track at the fair ground got asked by TobyMac himself to dance on stage during the last song. That was so cool. I'm now proud to say that I am a true Christian and I am not going to hide my faith away any longer because I found myself this summer so it is time now to show the world who I really am. I've been hiding for the past four years. It's time that I make my come back and leave my mark on this world. As a bullying survivor, I'm confident that this is the right time.
He played my favorite two songs, and I cried because Unstoppable brought me back to the time where I was being bullied and I played that just to have that confidence boost to get through the day, and City on Our Knees, well that was the song that I played when I first got in the bullying mess for some reason, and I will continue to play it even though I'm no longer in that mess praise the lord. It was just awful in those four years, that I'm so happy that I overcame and I never want to go back there again. I'm unstoppable now. I am going to do the things that I want to do because I want to leave MY mark on this world, not anyone else's mark.
In twenty one days, that will be happening, and I am kind of nervous. I hope people like and accept the real me, and if not they will have a long four or five years with me because I'm not changing anymore. I'll only change for me, because what I want is what counts. Not what anyone else wants. If I listened to other people like I did before I'd be going a million different directions and things would catch up with me sooner or later. Believe me I wish I could go back four years and change everything back but I can't do that. I wasted four years of my life.
My friends tried to tell me that from the start but I didn't bother to listen to them and now all I can say is sorry because they were right, and they left me. I have new friends now, but they won't ever be as good as the one who saw me through. She's a Christian as well, and thanked me for being so open about my faith on this blog. I just told her that I wasn't all the way open until now. Thanks for pushing me this far Rachel and TobyMac. I love you guys lots, and I look up to you as my role models because you are so amazing. I'll never be as amazing as you, or even close. I'd fall flat on my face and be back to square one before that would happen.
I'd also like to say thanks to all the blogettes who have viewed this blog and made it into what it is today. I would have given up a long time ago if it wasn't for you. The vlogs start in 21 days and I am nervous for that because I have to be spot on because I am recorded. These vlogs will make my blog be more interactive and allow you to have more of a connection to me, and the things that I write about.
This school year might get wild at times, but there is not going to be a dull free moment. I want to make sure that everyone is smiling, and doing good. No one deserves to feel down. I felt down a lot last year and I held those feelings in and put a fake smile on my face. No one could really understand what that year was like, but I made it through and I overcame bullying. I am now going to tell others that they need to spit out their feelings. It isn't healthy holding them in. Bullying is not okay and if you speak out and up against it, you'll get out sooner because the bullies know that they won't win. I didn't do this until the fourth year. I should have done it sooner but the lord had it all planned. It all happened for some reason or another, and I know that I can tell others about it.
If you are being bullied, I want you to know that I am here for you, and that you do matter and you do have a voice that needs to be heard. I know my passion was singing and acting. This blog is also my voice I guess. Oh, and here's a thing I learned about friendship a couple of weekends ago. It is possible to stumble upon friends. I did, and we have been texting each other a lot. This blog actually connected me with a friend as well who just adores this like crazy.
Wednesday, July 3, 2013
Last Post Before Camp!
Hey, blogettes! I just wanted you to know that this is most likely going to be my last post before I go to bible camp in three days. I don't know when I will write again because I know that these next week at least is going to be really busy for me. I just got over a black eye, but eye shadow really seemed to do the trick most of the time. I'm really nervous to go to camp because I am the only first year in the group that I am going with. I have fallen madly in love with the Pandora app for the Ipod because it freshens up my mind with the fact that this is my summer and I am going to make sure it is filled to the brink with fun. This is my summer and no one is going to take it away from me.
Nobody is going to change that for anything, and I am going to make sure that this sudden strike of confidence lasts throughout the school year. The party of the summer doesn't need to stop just because school has started again. It just means that I need to dial it down a bit. I am going to make sure that people know that life is a party meant to celebrate and have fun. Even when we have school or work, we can still find time to have fun. The overall party never ends because there is always someone having fun.
The more I think about camp the more my heart races. I just want the time to be here already, because I have been looking forward to attending this camp for awhile now. Make that at least a couple of years, but I finally got serious enough to speak up and say hey may I go to camp this year. I'll admit that I never thought that my parents would say yes. I can't believe that they did either. I was thinking did someone trade out my mom because my mom usually never lets me do something that is a lot of fun where I will be away from home like this. I gladly thanked them and started getting the information that I needed. First they told me that I had enough money to do something really fun. I automatically turned to bible camp because that is something that like I wrote before have wanted to attend for a while now.
It will help me get deeper with my faith and walk with the Lord. I figure that if this is the summer and time where I am reinventing myself and finding the real me then I should go all out and get deeper into my faith. I need to balance my faith with life and if it isn't fresh like me it will just be weird. I'm changing this time because I want to and I got so off track with people telling me what to be and where to go instead of going the way that my heart and mind wanted me to go. I would have been better off doing that. I would not be in half of the mess that I am right now. I wouldn't be so lost, and people would not be able to say, "Remember the time when you did this and you failed?" or "Why did you do that?" "Why did you waste your time doing that?" I would not have to spend this summer finding out who I am. I could just spend this summer having even more fun. I could spend less time looking like a lost puppy or like I am out of place and don't know what I am doing.
Oh, and here's a note, I'm sick and tired of downgradement. I'm taking charge and saying that I am worth something and I don't need anyone trash talking me. If you don't like what I do or my blogs then avoid me or quit reading the blog. Let me tell you now, my friends have wrote me letters telling me how much my blog means to them and how much better their lives have gotten and how much easier middle school has been because of it. I feel good that I am making a mark in this world, and I am making a difference even if it is a little one it is still a difference. This is my summer, and my time to shine. Nothing is going to get me down anymore because I have more power than those people. I have the Lord and with the Lord I can do anything. Nothing is impossible with him on my side.
I just don't care what people think. I'm going to be me and embrace my flaws. Who cares about being accepted. I have learned that anything I do to get closer to being perfect and accepted gets me no where in life. They will just keep raising the bar so it isn't worth trying to get. I have wasted enough of my time doing that when I should have been finding myself. I have big flaws that I will never be able to change like my crooked pinkie toes. Even though I can have surgery on them it doesn't mean that I will do it. The tube that I have in my stomach to drain excess fluids that I have finally grown out of and that is believed to be the cause of my migraines that cannot be taken out because it could cause brain damage. Those are big flaws, that I have learned to embrace.
My out of date clothes, I have found a way to update. I will tell you that in a later post. In my next post I will have details of all my travels in this next week.
Here's a random fact: I think I have shed more tears in the past two weeks than I have in a long time. I think it is because someone is just envious of the fact that I have, not having a big head here, an amazing blog that makes a difference again even if it is a small one in this world.
Anyways, I will write again whenever my next trip to the library is. My sister can drive now so I guess I could get a ride from her. I thank you all for viewing my blog even when it hasn't been updated for a long time. I promise I will get better at this whole ordeal, I really will. Next summer will be better because I have a summer like it under my belt.
Nobody is going to change that for anything, and I am going to make sure that this sudden strike of confidence lasts throughout the school year. The party of the summer doesn't need to stop just because school has started again. It just means that I need to dial it down a bit. I am going to make sure that people know that life is a party meant to celebrate and have fun. Even when we have school or work, we can still find time to have fun. The overall party never ends because there is always someone having fun.
The more I think about camp the more my heart races. I just want the time to be here already, because I have been looking forward to attending this camp for awhile now. Make that at least a couple of years, but I finally got serious enough to speak up and say hey may I go to camp this year. I'll admit that I never thought that my parents would say yes. I can't believe that they did either. I was thinking did someone trade out my mom because my mom usually never lets me do something that is a lot of fun where I will be away from home like this. I gladly thanked them and started getting the information that I needed. First they told me that I had enough money to do something really fun. I automatically turned to bible camp because that is something that like I wrote before have wanted to attend for a while now.
It will help me get deeper with my faith and walk with the Lord. I figure that if this is the summer and time where I am reinventing myself and finding the real me then I should go all out and get deeper into my faith. I need to balance my faith with life and if it isn't fresh like me it will just be weird. I'm changing this time because I want to and I got so off track with people telling me what to be and where to go instead of going the way that my heart and mind wanted me to go. I would have been better off doing that. I would not be in half of the mess that I am right now. I wouldn't be so lost, and people would not be able to say, "Remember the time when you did this and you failed?" or "Why did you do that?" "Why did you waste your time doing that?" I would not have to spend this summer finding out who I am. I could just spend this summer having even more fun. I could spend less time looking like a lost puppy or like I am out of place and don't know what I am doing.
Oh, and here's a note, I'm sick and tired of downgradement. I'm taking charge and saying that I am worth something and I don't need anyone trash talking me. If you don't like what I do or my blogs then avoid me or quit reading the blog. Let me tell you now, my friends have wrote me letters telling me how much my blog means to them and how much better their lives have gotten and how much easier middle school has been because of it. I feel good that I am making a mark in this world, and I am making a difference even if it is a little one it is still a difference. This is my summer, and my time to shine. Nothing is going to get me down anymore because I have more power than those people. I have the Lord and with the Lord I can do anything. Nothing is impossible with him on my side.
I just don't care what people think. I'm going to be me and embrace my flaws. Who cares about being accepted. I have learned that anything I do to get closer to being perfect and accepted gets me no where in life. They will just keep raising the bar so it isn't worth trying to get. I have wasted enough of my time doing that when I should have been finding myself. I have big flaws that I will never be able to change like my crooked pinkie toes. Even though I can have surgery on them it doesn't mean that I will do it. The tube that I have in my stomach to drain excess fluids that I have finally grown out of and that is believed to be the cause of my migraines that cannot be taken out because it could cause brain damage. Those are big flaws, that I have learned to embrace.
My out of date clothes, I have found a way to update. I will tell you that in a later post. In my next post I will have details of all my travels in this next week.
Here's a random fact: I think I have shed more tears in the past two weeks than I have in a long time. I think it is because someone is just envious of the fact that I have, not having a big head here, an amazing blog that makes a difference again even if it is a small one in this world.
Anyways, I will write again whenever my next trip to the library is. My sister can drive now so I guess I could get a ride from her. I thank you all for viewing my blog even when it hasn't been updated for a long time. I promise I will get better at this whole ordeal, I really will. Next summer will be better because I have a summer like it under my belt.
Wednesday, June 26, 2013
Laptop Post
Hey, blogettes! My older sister is being nice and letting me use her laptop to write this post today. I guess it's because she is in a good mood because she had a date with her boyfriend this afternoon. Anyways, I'm writing this post to tell you about what happened last night. I talked to Ali Givens the girl who started the Voice program, and she totally disapproved of me being a honorary member of the Voice because that meant that I was a part of it when really I should be in the crowd of middle schoolers learning from them. I saw what she meant, and I just told her that I wasn't a member of the groups that went around talking to the classes, I told her that I was more of the behind the scenes organizer.
She said that was nice that I was helping the program stay organized, but I could tell that she was a little disappointed that I was involved in the program in the first place because it is for high schoolers only, so I quickly got off of that subject, and I just walked away from her because I wasn't going to have anymore drama.
You are probably wondering how I talked to her last night because she is a softball player, so she would be busy playing her game, but I stayed after, and I talked to her while she was packing up her gear.
Running my sister's laptop is a cinch because it is is a MacBook G4. It's silver, and really sleek, and professional looking even though it is huge and very thick. I've got skills with any kind of MacBook because I got to work on one along side most of the girls reading this blog throughout the school year, because our school has a wonderful 1 to 1 program for students in 6-12 grade. The program has opened up a lot of doors for me, and some of them were amazing, and others just made me wonder why I even bothered to open the door into something negative like it gave me.
I also wrote in my journal last night about the incident that happened in the morning and then it hit me, I needed to go my own way or else people will keep on thinking that it is okay to treat me like that because I keep on listening to them and doing and being what they want me to be. I'm never who I want to be until now. From now on, I am no longer holding back my feelings or trying to hide them, I'm going to show them. From now on, I'm only going to listen to my heart and let it lead me. I need to do that or else my future is going to be really hard because I did nothing that I needed to do in order to be prepared for the job that I am hoping to hold.
I know that I will never be perfect enough to live up to your standards, so I mise well at least live up to my loser low standards so that I can feel like I matter even though I don't because I can't do anything right, and I really don't have a social life besides this blog. I'm just going to earn the title of the Biggest Loser Ever in Middle School so I mise well do things that will bring me success in the future because success is too far to reach and too late to reach at this time.
That doesn't mean I'm not going to try and reach it, believe me I am going to try with all of my heart, and it might happen because when I get onto something I try and make it work. I'm going to find myself, and be myself, and not listen to what the other people out there have to say about the person that I am turning out to be because it will please me and help me out in my future which is all that will ever really matter. I'm not going to quit on this blog though, even though it really isn't me.
Instead, I'm going to take this blog on a totally different path that will show me, and who I am and how far I've come in finding myself, and yet do things that represent you readers out there as well because this blog won't turn out to be all about me after all. This is a blog for the public, and it is going to stay that way. That's my promise to you out there. Keep on reading my blog and you will see the change throughout the rest of this summer and into the school year. My blog is about to get crazy, fun, and interactive. It's going to be better than it has ever been before because I am going to get more ideas, and I am just going to try and run with them as much as I can.
Of course that doesn't mean that it will always end up on the blog because sometimes it's really stupid or would not make sense, and I am not going to trash the blog. I am going to keep it clean, and easy and fun for you to read and understand. Maybe it will even spark some ideas for you to run with, and do great things in this world with. This is our world, let's shape it together into the world we want it to be.
She said that was nice that I was helping the program stay organized, but I could tell that she was a little disappointed that I was involved in the program in the first place because it is for high schoolers only, so I quickly got off of that subject, and I just walked away from her because I wasn't going to have anymore drama.
You are probably wondering how I talked to her last night because she is a softball player, so she would be busy playing her game, but I stayed after, and I talked to her while she was packing up her gear.
Running my sister's laptop is a cinch because it is is a MacBook G4. It's silver, and really sleek, and professional looking even though it is huge and very thick. I've got skills with any kind of MacBook because I got to work on one along side most of the girls reading this blog throughout the school year, because our school has a wonderful 1 to 1 program for students in 6-12 grade. The program has opened up a lot of doors for me, and some of them were amazing, and others just made me wonder why I even bothered to open the door into something negative like it gave me.
I also wrote in my journal last night about the incident that happened in the morning and then it hit me, I needed to go my own way or else people will keep on thinking that it is okay to treat me like that because I keep on listening to them and doing and being what they want me to be. I'm never who I want to be until now. From now on, I am no longer holding back my feelings or trying to hide them, I'm going to show them. From now on, I'm only going to listen to my heart and let it lead me. I need to do that or else my future is going to be really hard because I did nothing that I needed to do in order to be prepared for the job that I am hoping to hold.
I know that I will never be perfect enough to live up to your standards, so I mise well at least live up to my loser low standards so that I can feel like I matter even though I don't because I can't do anything right, and I really don't have a social life besides this blog. I'm just going to earn the title of the Biggest Loser Ever in Middle School so I mise well do things that will bring me success in the future because success is too far to reach and too late to reach at this time.
That doesn't mean I'm not going to try and reach it, believe me I am going to try with all of my heart, and it might happen because when I get onto something I try and make it work. I'm going to find myself, and be myself, and not listen to what the other people out there have to say about the person that I am turning out to be because it will please me and help me out in my future which is all that will ever really matter. I'm not going to quit on this blog though, even though it really isn't me.
Instead, I'm going to take this blog on a totally different path that will show me, and who I am and how far I've come in finding myself, and yet do things that represent you readers out there as well because this blog won't turn out to be all about me after all. This is a blog for the public, and it is going to stay that way. That's my promise to you out there. Keep on reading my blog and you will see the change throughout the rest of this summer and into the school year. My blog is about to get crazy, fun, and interactive. It's going to be better than it has ever been before because I am going to get more ideas, and I am just going to try and run with them as much as I can.
Of course that doesn't mean that it will always end up on the blog because sometimes it's really stupid or would not make sense, and I am not going to trash the blog. I am going to keep it clean, and easy and fun for you to read and understand. Maybe it will even spark some ideas for you to run with, and do great things in this world with. This is our world, let's shape it together into the world we want it to be.
Saturday, June 22, 2013
You Never Realize How Handy a Laptop is Until You Don't Have One
Hey, blogettes! I'm so sorry that I haven't written on my blog for a long time. Believe me, I am trying to write on here more often, but it has been really hard because I am without a laptop, and my parents said that I can't use any of their computers, so if I want to write a post on my blog, I have to walk down to the library, and most of the time there is someone else on the computer, and I hate asking because it's weird, and I'm not that good at public speaking when I am being myself. Acting is something different that I love to do because it doesn't feel weird talking in front of people because you have lines that you memorized, and technically, you aren't you, you are the person that you have been practicing for.
I never realized how much I relied on that laptop the school gave us to use until now because I am so reliant on my own two feet which are sore from my workouts to get me down to the library to use one of their computers. I know that you girls deserve to hear from me more often this summer, so I will try my hardest to get down to the library more often. Might not be any time soon anymore, because I am really busy trying to get ready for my back to back camp trips in two weeks. Anytime after that I will try to plan more trips. I tried writing a post on my Ipod, but that didn't turn out too well. It worked but it took me a long time because my thumbs are huge and the keys on the Ipod Touch Screen Keyboard are small, so it really wasn't a good mix.
Looking outside the library window, it looks like today will be a great day to go to the pool. Today is also a fellow Voice member's first day as a lifeguard, and she emailed me stating how nervous she was, and I told her that I think she was going to do fine. I mean, she has all the traits that I think a good lifeguard should have. I also told her not to be so nervous, because nervous people tend to be distracted, and that would really be a problem, because someone could drown. Some nerves just won't go away because lifeguards always have to be prepared and on edge.
I never realized how much I relied on that laptop the school gave us to use until now because I am so reliant on my own two feet which are sore from my workouts to get me down to the library to use one of their computers. I know that you girls deserve to hear from me more often this summer, so I will try my hardest to get down to the library more often. Might not be any time soon anymore, because I am really busy trying to get ready for my back to back camp trips in two weeks. Anytime after that I will try to plan more trips. I tried writing a post on my Ipod, but that didn't turn out too well. It worked but it took me a long time because my thumbs are huge and the keys on the Ipod Touch Screen Keyboard are small, so it really wasn't a good mix.
Looking outside the library window, it looks like today will be a great day to go to the pool. Today is also a fellow Voice member's first day as a lifeguard, and she emailed me stating how nervous she was, and I told her that I think she was going to do fine. I mean, she has all the traits that I think a good lifeguard should have. I also told her not to be so nervous, because nervous people tend to be distracted, and that would really be a problem, because someone could drown. Some nerves just won't go away because lifeguards always have to be prepared and on edge.
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